Min is Lost And Lonely


Monday, July 05, 2004

 confused.. and scared...

Aus icq mi on sat.. mi start talking crap as usual.. somehow the topic of friendster came up.. then he login into his account.. the second time since he registered.. in years.. he told mi he finished updating liao.. kepo mi naturally wanna find out what is in his profile and such.. so mi do a search using his email.. dunno why mi remember it so well.. anyway.. saw his photo.. (he took it down after a few minutes.. no more le..) but cannot get to read his profile cos mi not in his friend list.. in the photo he was smiling.. quite happily.. mi viewed our "connections".. mostly is secondary school mates.. straight after that we moved onto other topics.. throughout the conversation he never say wanna add mi or anything like that.. suddenly feel kinda sad..

got the feeling that we are just strangers pretending to be friends.. he wanna be "friends" cos he wanna reduce his guilt ba.. mi try to conceal mi true emotions and try to be his friends cos mi wanna let him feel better.. but guess its not working very well..

mi told miself that it is all over...
mi told miself to crush all hopes...
mi told miself to move on...

mi thought mi have succeed..

but why? why is there a tinge of pain, ache and sadness seeping deep into mi heart?




written by min @ 7/05/2004 01:05:00 AM
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